i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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