I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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