i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
