The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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