Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
