After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
