True but thats because hes a fetus.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she smelled like a LAN party
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
A+ Viking dick
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