i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Randomize
