If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
