i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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