I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Randomize
