And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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