I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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