Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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