The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
