I must be too annoying 4 u.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm just crazy horny about you
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
