I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
