before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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