He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
