My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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