508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize