i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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