just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
You're a waste of cheezeits
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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