what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
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