she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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