She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
