Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
