Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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