how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize