so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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