i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I am midnight drunk by noon
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
