FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
