What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
