Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
