are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
