Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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