You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
