We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize