East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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