yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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