Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
