I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
