I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Boobs are out for the taking
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize
