it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
