i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
