Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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