No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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