and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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