I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
she peed on how many people?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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