yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
